nights

...sometimes sadness was so overwhelming I couldn't contain it inside me. I couldn't be still couldn't be in one place.

I had to walk and walk and walk until I was exhausted. Until the Ipod died on me in the middle of nowhere.

Spent the rest of the night searching for wonders in the trash.

37 grados

...el amor ha sido algo putrefacto. Un hedor humedo que todo lo envuelve y lo impregna.

Pero una sabana batida de tu fragancia puede dejarse secando al sol de Occitania, o de México.

Desesperado, el hedor sera por un momento muy poderoso,mas apestoso que nunca.

Después, aunque el recuerdo haga de mi piel un cuero acartonado y descolorido,no quedara recuerdo de tu presencia.

The 4th Chakra

stop it

You don't deserve you depression.

Being down, being REALLY DOWN is an exquisite feeling, not to be confused with simple emotions like insecurity, fear or self PITY.

Down and out in Paris, London, Mexico, Lund, Los Angeles... the world.

under your spell

Hell, I thought I would never come back here. I thought I was so over all this nonesense!

Thank you.

THANK YOU for all this.

10 years in France

Nothing like a dream.

Thank you.

I have nothing else to say.

September

"...You were staying with me for the weekend. We came back to my place, it was night.

We were frozen by the rain and the cold weather and you went straight to a hot shower. I did the same and I came out to find you lying half asleep and half naked in bed.

Your skin was so warm and soft and we made love,slowly and intensely, the way you like it.

You were still lying facedown.

Listen to the rain -you said-

and oh, we listened.

We listened to the raindrops tap the window while we made love..."

I rest my case

Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.

— Homer, The Iliad

Toi

In the dark

with the tip of my fingers

I write your name on other skins.

Once I've done it I don't turn on the light anymore.

This way, in the darkness

it's still you.

It's ALWAYS you.

Domingo

Nos abandonamos

Una tarde de monstruos

En la porno cicatriz

Supra sensacion

Ser vivo

Ser piedra

Ser estrella

Ser vacio

Siento profundidad

Siento trascendencia

Confesión

Estoy seguro que la poesía y la música son verdades absolutas del mundo.

Es por esto que estoy perdido para siempre.

Sí, confieso que estoy enamorado de los sueños.

Soy adicto a soñar porque encuentro la realidad injusta,nefasta, mal hecha, mezquina...irreal.

Todos esos falsos objetivos y satisfacciones fatuas.

Esta no es la conciencia.

Si esto es lo real, la humanidad es un error.

Enciclopedia Galactica

somos una especie con un remedo de inteligencia.

Una especie de hecho muy atrasada.

Hemos logrado un rudimentario dominio sobre la materia, juguetes de plastico, silicio y metal que en nada han mejorado nuestra existencia.

En el mundo de hoy somos esclavos de un dictador implacable y voraz: la pantallita.

¿El flujo de electrones es nuestro triunfo como especie?

Es por eso que nos sentimos solos. Si existen, las Grandes Inteligencias del Universo nos ignoran. Somos hormigas afanosas de banalidad en su patio estelar.

No tenemos ningun dominio ni maestria sobre la mente y el espiritu.

Ni siquiera podemos estar seguros que EXISTEN.

Noise

All my friends

All the people I know

Are dreams

Mystical facts in different states of incompleteness

No mas Sangre.

Mexico.

desde 2006. 35000 muertos, seguramente mas. No queremos mas muertos, no queremos mas sangre.

Ni uno mas.

Azul casi morado

Adios Rita,

buscaremos tu voz en la oscuridad, ahi donde sonries.

Gracias por TODO.

Foto: Jorge Claro León

The Crust

I didn't touch my wound.

didn't touch it FOR YEARS!

I waited patiently. Desperately.

Oh gods how it ITCHED sometimes!

And now, finally, the crust is about to fall,to crumble, to disintegrate into human dust.

the crust is almost gone. Look, what a beautiful SCAR.

I'm about to be ready

for new desperations

My life and times

So so so so...

...random...

synæsthesia

A color is a flavor.

A month is purple.

Mostly a sound is pain.

Sometimes patterns are created when I think of people and places. I wish I could record those weird feelingsmellhear symphonies of my head.

This is Paris:



This is Toronto:



This is Mexico City:




Maybe sometime I'll try to draw people, or time.


Go figure:

The 365 days of Andy Soto

I'm always saying that I'm finally going to change, But I will this time!

Nevertheless,somethings will stay the same. I want to KNOW how much I'm going to accomplish.

So, next year I will be really serious.

In 2011, I'll most likely go back to live in Toronto,Canada.

In 2011 I'll still be interested in chaos and randomness.

Sadly, music will still be the most important thing in my life.

I will make yet another record.

In 2011 I´ll still be dreaming in soundscapes.

In 2011 I will have more synthesizers.More more MORE!

In 2011 I will write more short stories, I´ll finish that novel. Maybe.

I will smell the blue breeze of the pacific ocean once again.

In 2011 my dreams will be more interesting that the "real" life around me and I'll deal with it.

I´ll get stoned again, maybe.

In 2011 I will be a dad!

In 2011 I will go to India.

In 2011 I will resist.

I will forget.

I'll keep my mouth shut.But not my mind.

In 2011 I will leave any possible sorrow buried in the snow, to better love the sun!

In 2011, simple happiness will be ENOUGH.

la nuit.

I.

Dusk.

I leave my soul on a bench in front of my house every night, eager to know what becomes of her there while I sleep.

I get her back in the morning, and I sit beside her watching the sun light the street once again.

In her eyes,there is an emotion,unfathomable, after all the startles and prodigies of the night.

And all my hopes are false.


II.

I love the night.

I love the night in Mexico City.

I put awesome music on and I just DRIVE.

I drive until I don't know where I am, until the streets become other planets and the sweetness is below my feet.

III

I saw you in my dream!

I had to wake up as I didn't want to start lying to you again.